The Bomb Squad Is Here!

I was sitting in my favorite chair this morning trying to be still and quiet. I could see out into my yard and noticed that the wind was blowing pretty good, and it looked like it was getting colder outside. I checked the forecast on my phone’s weather app. I was right, it was starting to get cooler. It’s that time of year where Fall is hanging on and old man Winter is starting to let us know that it won’t be long. I love the Fall, especially in Georgia, but I think I’m still a summer guy at heart and therefore when the seasons are about to change again, I start getting the pangs for summer and miss all the fun, the longer days, the good weather, and the tons to do and see.

I’m also a sucker for nostalgia and have too much time on my hands lately so I got to thinking about summer days growing up in Tire Town and all the fun I had in my little slice of Americana in the 60s and 70s. It’s not so much escapism as it is a look back to an easier time that I didn’t realize would end when I “grew up”. Frankly, that’s all that I wanted to be when I was younger, was older. I should have listened closer to the older folks that were trying to get me to slow down and enjoy it. Who knew, right?

Then I got a notification on my phone (more on that later).

One day a while back, I saw the movie, The Sandlot. It took me back to the mid 1970s immediately. There was a lot to relate to for me and the guys I hung around with in that movie, especially the scenes at the public pool. We even tried our luck with the hot female lifeguards but didn’t have as much luck as Squints did but that didn’t stop us from trying! We were either playing baseball or heading to the pool.

One of the “standards” that went on for me and my friends in the summer was finding a place to go swimming during the day. I was fortunate and had several really fun spots to choose from. The closest one was right at dead man’s curve on Canton Road called Brownies. At least that’s what we called it. It was behind a restaurant called Brownies and a lot of kids from the surrounding neighborhoods would swim there. I don’t believe the Brown family owned the public pool but the rest of us decided to name it after them. By the way, their chicken dinners were the real deal!

As my fading memory recalls, it cost $2 or $3 to get into the pool. I typically had no money back then, so the next step was to call up some buddies and see who wanted to go to Brownies and then we would pool our enormous trust funds, and we would then figure out how much we were short to get in. We then started gathering pop bottles and taking them to the Lawson’s store down the street for the refund. Most days we had to get creative in our search for funds but most days we got enough. We would jump on our banana seat bikes and head for the pool.

We were told specifically by our baseball coach NOT TO SWIM on game days. We would nod our heads at him and then would look at the other guys on the team and wink. We were going swimming! However, coach would drive up to the pool and peek over the fence to see if we were there, so we got pretty good at dipping under water when we saw him roll up. You didn’t want to be on the high dive at that point. You were dead meat if that happened.

Speaking of the high dives. They were the greatest! The diving end of the pool was about 10 or 12 feet deep so you could really enjoy the dives. The main rule was there could only be one person on the board at the same time. You couldn’t even be on the ladder when someone was up there doing a dive. You also had to wait for the person to clear underneath before you could even start going up the ladder for your turn. We would love to do splash dives like a “preachers’ seat, cannonball, or try and jump as close to the lifeguards stand as possible to drown them. That usually got a whistle and a threat to sit out for 30 minutes if we didn’t knock it off. You can guess how much we liked being held to such tight rules so you can probably guess what is coming next.

After they threatened us with expulsion from the pool all day for not following the dive zone rules, we would look down at our feet and pledge to not do it again (and then go do it again). As the day got near the end, and it was almost time to go home, we would gather the heathens we called “The Bomb Squad” and plan a “Splash Party.” This would get us kicked out since it was prohibited and broke every single one of the rules. We would all line up on the ladder and would run up on the board all at once while the lifeguard went berserk with the whistle. The lifeguard would come down out of the chair and as we surfaced, she would kick us out for the rest of the day. We would leave, get on our bikes and roll up to the fence just behind her stand and blow her kisses as we left. I think she really dug me. I’m sure of it. I could tell by the way she totally ignored me.

After we got kicked out, we would generally have to lay low for a few days and then come back and do all the same silly stuff all over again (I mean we were 13 and 14). The Bomb Squad and I would have to take our “talents” to some of the other public pools in the area and as much as possible we would go to our friend’s house who had a pool in her back yard (can you hear the flapping of angels wings right now?).

Today’s blog will be some tales about the world infamous Bomb Squad of Ellet being let loose at a friend’s house we will call Linda (because that’s her name) and about her wonderful mother that requested our services to keep the water level at the pool at manageable levels.

But First…A Joke:

Four expectant fathers are waiting in a Minneapolis hospital maternity ward while their wives are in labor. The nurse comes in and tells the first man, “Congratulations! You are the father of twins!” “What a coincidence!” he says. “I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team!”

The nurse returns and tells the second man, “Your wife had triplets!” “Wow, what a coincidence! I work for 3M Company!”

Then the nurse tells the third man that he and his wife now have quadruplets. “Another coincidence! I work at the Four Seasons Hotel!”

At this point, the fourth man faints. When he comes to, the others ask what’s wrong. “What’s wrong?! I work for 7 Up!”

Bonus Dad Joke:

I’ll never forget the last thing Grandpa said before he kicked the bucket: “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

A Verse to Contemplate:

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom - Proverbs 11:2

Have I Told You This One?

Linda’s family had a house that was a few blocks from the Rutledge Estate on Stevenson Avenue. We grew up together. She had three beautiful sisters. We went to the same schools, we bowled together, and we considered ourselves to be brother and sister. I still call her sis when I speak to her. We teased that we were going to get married someday. They also had a cool rec room in the basement that we hung out in a lot, and they had a pool; I may have mentioned that. Right in the back yard and it was fabulous. You could go right out of the kitchen sliding doors and you were on the concrete deck. The garage was to the left of the pool and there was a diving board.

As you might imagine, she was very popular being the only kid in the neighborhood that had their own pool! The one “problem” was that she couldn’t go to the public pool with all of us because she had a pool in her yard. Have I mentioned that? So, since we were such good friends, we sacrificed going to the public pool to go and swim at Linda’s house. It had nothing to do with being banned from Brownies and running out of pop bottles to return.

Her mom was great. She always saw through all of our BS and would allow us to swim there fairly regularly. Not every day but pretty often. She actually was the one to label us The Bomb Squad! Here’s why. She had one rule (there’s that word again!). We could not jump off of the garage into the pool. Diving board only! We would nod and swear to be good boys and start scaling the fence to get on top of the garage. She always sat right next to the sliding glass doors, so it was tricky to pull it off, but we HAD to, right?!

What always gave us away was the four big kerplunk sounds that were made from jumping off the roof versus the small diving board in short succession. She would come out and ask if we jumped off the garage and we would lie very badly. She would look up on the roof and ask us to explain why there were wet footprints up there. We had not thought that far ahead and therefore were busted.

One summer it had rained a ton (I know, hard to believe that it rains in Ohio when you don’t want it to), and the pool was almost overflowing. She told Linda to call the Bomb Squad over to take a foot of water out of the pool (without jumping off the garage). We were happy to oblige and had a ball swimming in the rain and doing our civic duty by dropping the water level considerably in a short period of time.

I haven’t seen her or spoken to her in forever. Life does that to brothers and sisters sometimes. We also share something else in common that we both wish we didn’t. We lost our spouses over the past handful of years. The boys of the Bomb Squad also have not been together in almost 50 years now.

As I was sitting in my house looking at the wind blowing my pine trees around and thinking about better days I received a text from her. The text reads that it has been raining too much in Ohio again and she needs the Bomb Squad to come over. Her parents, like mine, have passed recently but they have left us with a lot of great memories.

I miss you “sis” and thanks for making my day by bringing up a ton of great memories. The Bomb Squad may take a little longer to get up on the garage, but I bet we can move the water out!

A Prayer:

Heavenly Father, help me to use my time wisely in order to leave a mark on this world for You. Help me to make the most of the time and opportunities You give me.

Book Recommendation:

Unoffendable by Brant Hansen (2015)

Music Recommendation:

James Gang Rides Again by James Gang (1969)

Quote of the Day:

“I have learned that to be with those I like is enough.” - Walt Whitman